This week has been very hectic. It is so funny how life can change in just an instant. I have been trying to find my place in the world for a while now with a job and other things and was at a point that I wanted to give up. I am not a huge pray-er for myself. I will ask for others but I probably felt I just didn’t deserve much so why make things awkward and ask? But the other night I was so down I just sat outside with the stars and cried and asked God for help. The next day I woke up and looked through the paper (AGAIN) and revised my resume and went cold calling and by the end of the day I had two jobs working with animals which is what I love. I was told I had a very impressive resume. I never put too much focus on that because I didn’t want people to think I was tooting my own horn and I have never viewed what I have done in my life as anything remarkable. I have dabbled in many things and took advantage of opportunities because I think at times I was actually pretty lucky. I am wondering if my resume is the reason I got hired or something else. If it was resume than I have not utilized this near enough!! But I am thinking it is something so much bigger than me.
The other thing that has stayed on my mind is my Rosie. She really needs exercise and some lessons on Manners Can Be Fun. In order to get the use of my neighbors round pen would require me to ask for help. Again…I am not good at doing that. I don’t want my neighbor to see me coming and roll his eyes in frustration or feel I am using him or his resources but I am in desperation here, I have tried everything else and I would only use his round pen when he was at work and not using it himself BUT everyday I would chicken out about asking. Finally I prayed once again.
Yesterday morning I woke up to a world of white. There was 6-8 inches on the ground. It was beautiful but it certainly indicated that winter was definitely here. So I bundled up and went out to feed Rosie. When I got out to her pen it was empty. SHE WAS GONE!!!!! My heart stopped and I held my breath as my brain tried to compute what the ramifications were. When my breathing and my heart started once again I could not help the tears that began rolling down my face. I knew my neighbor would be out to feed his horses about then so I took a chance and knocked on his door. His daughter answered and I asked “Have you seen my horse?” Her face broke out in a wide grin and she yelled “DAD!!…The lady is here for her horse!!” He walked around the corner of his hall with a wide grin on his face. Apparently at three in the morning Rosie decided she would rather watch the snow fall with some company so she opened her gate and went visiting the handsome boys next door. He heard a ruckus in the middle of the night and went out and saw all these tracks so he followed them around back and bumped into Rosie. He put her in the round pen and went to bed waiting for the inevitable hysterical knock on the door in the morning. He was so nice about it and helped me get her home. I took that opportunity to ask if I could use his round pen and he was more than willing to let me use it. So today we are going to start getting some exercise and we are going to learn how to be a horse and not a princess that just does what she wants to all day long.
It is just funny how just by asking in a simple prayer all of my obstacles were removed and I was able to resolve so many of my problems.
I have to keep reminding myself that it is okay to ask for help from a variety of sources and to recognize I don’t have to solve all the world’s problems or even my own all by myself.